HOLY WAFFLES, PARK SLOPE, IT’S NUMBER 5 RECYCLING DAY!

Many of my Sundays are spent at the Tea Lounge pretending I’m advancing my career as a writer (come say s'up, friends!).  Usually, I make my grand entrance onto Union street from Seventh--this is so the coopretards and I stay clear out of each other’s paths. 

Yesterday, I made the mistake of approaching the Tea Lounge from Fifth (foreshadowing: BIG MISTAKE). As a result, I had to walk through the most insane Coop madness I’ve ever seen: NUMBER FIVE RECYCLING DAY!!!! 

For those of you unfamiliar with Number Five recycling day, here's the deal: the Coop recycles plastic that the city doesn't --that means all of the numbers that aren't 1 and 2 on the bottom of jars and tubs and shit.

Have you ever seen this shitshow in action!?? It was like the fucking apocalypse had decided *not* to wait until 2012, but instead landed on a five-by-ten patch of sidewalk in front of the Coop.  Bags were flying, people were yelling--it was plastic pandemonium.  SAVE THE FUCKING EARTH AND DESTROY ANYONE IN THE WAY!!! 

Great idea. 

I almost got run down by a stroller dad just trying to get up the street with his Bloomingdales shopping bags full of potential recyclables.

Look people: I'm seriously all for recycling.  I'm not, however, for risking the lives of innocent bystanders in the name of recycling your number 5 plastic cup, just so you can prove to your friends how liberal you are and how global warming isn't your fault.

Anyway.

I'd like to send a special shoutout to the eight red-vested coop members sitting outside who weren’t afraid to show on their faces how much they wanted to shoot themselves.  I have a great level of respect for those who understand that they can have their $1.20 tortillas, and rock a brooding grimace, too.

Go green!

Meredith is a freelance writer who can often be found yelling at her computer in the Tea Lounge while editing her first novel.  She lives on the border of Park Slope and Windsor Terrace, depending on who you ask (but defends Terrace Bagels to the death, regardless).  She self-indulgently writes about  all of these things on her personal blog: http://meredithturits.tumblr.com.