Gowanus: Where Hipsters Will Go To Retire ('Cause They're Getting a Shuffleboard Bar!!)

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I’ve always said that Park Slope is where hipsters go to grow up. While in the heights of your hipster career, Williamsburg makes for a vibrant setting. Later, after finding that special someone with tattoos that compliment yours, and upon birthing a little bundle of Band of Horses, Park Slope is the natural move.

But where does a hipster go to spend the indie rock golden years? That’s right, the Gowanus.

And by retire, I of course mean ironically act like a retired person. Hipsters love to act like old people! Or at least that’s what the owners of The Royal Palms are counting on. The new club will offer a plethora of elderly-oriented activities including shuffleboard, bingo, lounge music and even reruns of The Love Boat. That, coupled with a full bar and lounge, will make this a place where a mustachioed man and his moo-moo-clad mama can feel at home. AKA hipster paradise.

The bar’s co-owner, Ashley Albert, is not making the location public yet pending final lease negotiations. But she is trumpeting her hopes for the Boca Roton themed club:

“There’s just something kind of cool about old time-y activities,” she said. “Right?”

She better hope these whippersnappers agree.

[Via the Brooklyn Paper]