Got $9 million burning a hole in your pocket? Quick, move to The Slope!

Image via ny.curbed.comBallers, sugar babies, Brooklyn Nets players and mobsters, get your checkbooks ready! (Those are the only people that have that kind of cash lying around, right?) A new townhouse on Garfield Place just popped on the market and it has your name on it, all for the pretty penny of $9 million.

Originally built in 1901, the house maintains its historic charm (read: it ain’t been touched in 100 years), so be prepared to keep your checkbook handy if you’re looking for something updated.  Along with the 9 bedrooms, and 5.5 baths, the house boasts stunning stain glass panels, hand carved mahogany staircase and more marble than a Chinese Checkers factory. 

If it’s anything like this Parisian apartment, left untouched for 70 years and recently discovered to be filled with millions worth of art and collectables, it may be a worthy investment. Don’t hold your breath, as I would bet the owners will be taking any and all collectibles with them. Regardless, my money is still on a hidden panel in the library.

Check out the full “brokerbabble” on Curbed to get the full rundown.