COOL OR NOT COOL: Chain Stores In Park Slope?

All this bitching and moaning about the opening of Petco's Unleashed has, yet, again, brought this issue to light: people in Park Slope seem to be against the idea of chain stores.

At least you seem that way in the comments of this blog, while sitting high up in the saddles of your high horses.

But again let me state for the record: every single time my ass goes into a chain store in Park Slope, it's packed to the rafters.

EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.

So who are all these people that are frequenting these chain stores if it's not you, btchz??

• BARNES & NOBLE - let's not front like you ain't bringing little miss junior misses and junior mister down to the kids section for Dan Zanes sing-a-longs, Park Slope BREEDERS (also let us join in with this mom's outrage over the fact that, MY WORD! they now expect people to actually buy the motherfucking books they're reading! THAT'S SUCH BULLSHIT). Anyway. There are never any tables in the cafe section, and this joint is always busting at the seams with people. 
• RITE-AID - I double dawg dare you to name any time of the day or night during this Rite-Aid's business hours when there is not a gigantic fucking line. DOUBLE. DAWG. DARE.
• STARBUCKS - Again, standing room only in this joint. You'll have an easier time sneaking into the Park Slope Food Coop, stealing access to the PA system, and reading through the entire OTBKB's Park Slope 100 list (with a fake Indian accent), then you will actually getting a table here. 
• CHEEBURGER CHEEBURGER - I am the sort of weird bitch that would actually order a cheeseburger over a steak any day of the week, and twice on the weekends. And yet if you gave me a $1000 gift certificate to CC, I would use it line my drawers. Still, every time I go by, all the tables are filled and there are usually people waiting to be seated.
• DUNKIN DONUTS - I've never so much stepped into Dunkin Donuts, but it's on the way to the 9th Street R/M train stop and I'm guessing 63% of you are stopping on the way to the subz in the morn to get coffee here. And rumor has it that another one is going into the old Tonio's space, so obvs there is a demand for it.

Here's the thing ppl: I get this desire to support local businesses cause there are a crapload of em around here that I totally, and completely love. But also: I went into Petco Unleashed last weeked and I encountered the following: a bazillion choices; clean, bright, airy aisles, great business hours, free delivery. I mean, at what point are we all supposed to just say "fine, I'll go to this local place even though it's way shittier than the chain store, just cuz I want to support local businesses?" Because I ask you this: are these local businesses doing their part to stick their necks out for us in the same way (better hours, better merch, listening to their customers)? For the record, I don't know: I'm asking.

I guess I just don't buy that because a few chain stores are coming in across Park Slope, this ENTIRE NEIGHBORHOOD is going to turn into chain after chain.

What the hell do you all think?