Brooklyn is a Bad Ass Name: No Shit
Phayder | Monday, May 12, 2014 at 7:00AM 
According to Social Security Administration, Brooklyn is the most popular female baby name beginning with “B” in the majority of the United States except for one place: New York. The reason for this is obvious. Real New Yorkers know how fucking cool Brooklyn is. If you live in Brooklyn and name your kid Brooklyn, you’re a poser.
Yo, that’s like walking around Times Square wearing an I Heart New York tee shirt. Don’t do that shit. You look like a tourist. Same thing goes for naming your baby girl Brooklyn if you live here; Fahgettaboudit.
Ain’t nobody naming their babies “Manhattan” or “Queens," because we all know what the best borough is.
These parents who live in Montana naming their little girls Brooklyn wish desperately that they (too) lived in Brooklyn. I don’t blame them, dude. Brooklyn is the shit. If there was a choice between living in Idaho and living in Brooklyn, uh…Brooklyn hands fucking down.
The people naming their girls Brooklyn in South Dakota were probably just listening to Jay-Z’s song Brooklyn, We Go Hard while working on conceiving their babies. Don’t even get me started on Jay-Z.
What happens if these Montana born Brooklyn babies grow up and move to real Brooklyn? WHAT HAPPENS THEN? If that’s not a mind fuck I don’t know what is. Maybe they can all go work at South Brooklyn Pizza. “Welcome to South Brooklyn Pizza, I’m Brooklyn, how can I help you?”
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