WTF Mark and Jessie?

On Sunday afternoon, my husband and I had just gotten home from eating entirely too much food at brunch when our mail slot clamored open. “We don’t get mail on Sundays,” I thought to myself. I ran to the front door to see what we got and saw the above photo at my feet.

“How cute,” I thought. “We got new neighbors and they are dropping of postcards to introduce themselves to people on the block.”

BUT THEN I flipped over the postcard to find this:

I have so many questions I want to ask Mark and Jessie.

Where do you think you are, Mark and Jessie? Are we in a real estate version of The Bachelor?

At what point in your house hunt do you look to your significant other and say, “You know what, we can’t afford to buy in this neighborhood so let’s just show everyone how positively adorable we are and of course people will want to sell their house to us (for below market value) and not the big mean companies and investors?”

Do you not realize how incredibly tone deaf this is, Mark and Jessie? How incredibly entitled this is? How ballsy? “We deserve to live in this neighborhood,” your postcard says “We work hard and everyone is against us…blah, blah, blah.”

Do what the rest of us do, Mark and Jessie. Realize you cannot afford to buy an obnoxiously priced one bedroom apartment (let alone a one to two family house). Make peace with it and take the money you would have saved for your down payment and take yourself out to brunch. At least then when you move to Long Island your bellies will be filled with Bloody Marys and pancakes.