Why is buying concert tickets so fucking hard?

image via flickriver.comWhen I was a teenager, I lived on Long Island and used to go to a ton of concerts. Between Jones Beach and MSG and Nassau Colosseum, all the big tours with the most popular artists were always a quick ride away. And then there were smaller venues like The Vanderbilt (RIP!) that always seemed to have amazing up-and-coming acts for $10 a ticket. I saw a lot of live music back then. Devoured it, even. 

But the last time I saw a live concert was just about a year ago. And that's because a friend had extra tickets. 

Part of the reason I've removed myself from the live music scene is because buying tickets has become an impossible experience. Back in '90s Long Island, I'd wake up early on a Saturday morning and go to Tower Records and wait in line for the Ticketmaster booth to open up. You'd get there at 6am or so, wait in the cold with the rest of your favorite artist's die-hard fans, and when the booth opened at 10am, you'd have your pick at prime tickets. Sometimes, your big sister would hang back at home, trying on the phone line (not my sister because she was a total bitch). And if your mom let you borrow her cell phone (which was approximately $100 a minute and was as big as a brick), you'd sometimes wait in line while being on the phone at the same time. It was a race to the finish line, but when you got there, there were pretty much always tickets. 

Nowadays, it's not that easy. Nowadays, every big concert has 100 exclusive pre-sales you magically have to know about.* And they all have different codes and requirements of credit cards you have to use or apps you need to download in order to get them. And by the time any show officially goes on sale to the public, it's like, completely sold out. And then you're totally forced to buy tickets from scalpers off Craigslist or StubHub, who completely jack up the price per ticket and totally fuck you out of being able to afford the tickets you need. You know what scalpers were like when I was younger? They were dirty old men who stood outside arenas and sold you day-of-the-show tickets. You could totally ignore them if you wanted. Now you're practically forced to use them exclusively to buy anything. Life sucks.

Also, I'm 30 and I can't believe I'm saying all this "when I was a kid" shit. Fuck me.

So how do you do it, friends? How do you buy concert tickets these days? What's the strategy? What do I need to know? And for fucks sake CAN SOMEONE GET ME TWO TICKETS TO BEYONCÉ AT BARCLAYS PLEASE?!?!? SHE'S ADDED A THIRD SHOW AND THEY GO ON SALE MONDAY AND I WANT THEM!

*I get that this isn't the case for smaller venues with more up-and-coming musicians, but I'm older and don't care about that shit anymore

Comments

[Renegade Priest]

You are 30 and you want to go to a Beyonce gig? Geez, you really are fucked!

[pb]

It's fairly easy to get presale codes off of the internet. I don't have a difficult time getting tickets, I have a difficult time accepting the $470 in fees that ticketmaster and the venue tack on to the sale price.

[NineDaves]

@RENEGADE PRIEST Um, Queen B is 31. Destiny's Child ruled the charts when I was in high school - the heyday of my addiction to bad pop music. We basically grew up together! Also, have you seen her live? B can TURN. IT. OUT.

[NineDaves]

@PB I've tried that (most recently for B) and found that the pre-sale codes often came up blank too. Also, is there a standard time for pre-sales? Like, if shows go on sale to general public on Monday, is pre-sale always on Friday? I've have a hard time figuring out WHEN those pre-sales happen, especially when each pre-sale is sponsored by different companies (AMEX, Visa, etc).

[alen]

check into joining the fan clubs of some artists. they have special pre-sales and tickets as well

i haven't been to a show in years. $100 a ticket for the cheap tickets is too much

[Eli]

You live in New York City, there are a hundred great shows you can go to every night that cost less than $10 cash at the door and many that are free. It's not that complicated, go have a great live music experience in a small club for a reasonable price.

[parksloper]

You certainly like to whine a lot, don't you. Concert tickets? Try taking that money and the exorbitant fees the online services charge for those tix you couldn't get and help out people in need maybe (i.e. hurricane victims)? Just a thought.

[alen]

corporate money

lots of companies buy tickets as gifts for customers or potential customers. if i didn't have any kids i would be going to free catered yankees games and other events

[i like big concerts, get over it]

Eveyone in these comments is being a dick. Beyonce is great. Big arena shows can be fun. Saying you shouldn't complain because you should donate all your free cash to hurricane victims is self righteous and ridiculous. Don't shit on our fun time.

[Park Rooney]

I want to agree with this so badly, but you come off like a whiney old man, you write like a Park Slope Andy Rooney, your avatar should be the 60 Minutes clock...

[Daniel]

There is not way to get good tickets the day it goes on sale. Seems like you know this already, so you should get an American Express and other similar cards so you can purchase tickets before the public. Also tickets prices are exorbitant. I know it is supply and demand, but 150 dollars for a good seat to listen to David Sedaris read from a book is crazy.