LOCAL LIVE PORN SHOW CANCELED!

Image via Gothamist.comHave you heard about the completely glass master bedroom and bathroom in Cobble Hill where a fabulous looking couple (he’s a Versace model, she works for the UN but has a sick bod) f*** all night long with whips and chains in giant squirrel costumes with Marie Antoinette wigs?  There’s a reclaimed teak seating platform on Court Street and you only have to wait in line for 45 minutes to get your viewing wristband (good for 15 minutes worth of FREE viewing!). You can even grab an artisanal popcorn and Blue Sky Organic Root Beer from the new food truck, PornCorn, which parks on the corner of Court and President.  Cobble Hill Cinemas is pissed because their ticket sales have gone down 80% in just one week, but come on, who wants to watch Oprah in a serious role anyway???  It’s summertime baby!

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We’ve Got Piper!

Image via nymag.comSummer 2013: the summer of pie pops, “Get Lucky,” and Orange is the New Black.

If you’re unfamiliar with any of these, it’s probably best that you just quietly remove yourself from civilized society.  If, however, you’ve been binging on tales from Litchfield and chocolate cream pie on sticks, you’ll be happy to know that Piper Kerman is one of us!

Piper Kerman, a.k.a “the real-life Piper Chapman,” lives right here in the Slope.  If you’ve read her memoir, you know that Kerman’s beloved fiancé Larry found them their Brooklyn home while she was in the clink (she trusted him to pick it out, sight unseen).  In an interview with New York Magazine, she gets more specific, not only confirming that she lives in Park Slope, but giving a shout-out to Pino’s.

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