Raze Parking Lots* and Put Up a Co-o-n-do (with apologies to Joni Mitchell)

This is the kind of topsy-turvy Park Slope world we’re living in: a bunch of co-op shopping, dog-loving, anti-Cuomo Democrats are about to get real sentimental about a parking garage. Because as onerous as a parking lot was to Joni c. 1970, new condos and a shortage of parking are to “long-time” (i.e., 5+ years) Park Slope residents. Fess up, neighbors: how many times have you heard yourself exclaiming 1) “can you believe all this new f*cking construction?! No wonder 321 is so crowded!” and 2) “I drove around for a fucking hour this morning looking for a fucking spot!”

Get your Kleenex out. The owner of 798 Union Street, a couple of doors away from the Co-op, apparently wants to octuple (or whatever) his rental income by converting the building into residential units.

Simple math: more residential units, fewer parking units = “I drove around for two hours this morning looking for a spot and didn’t find one and had to drive to Carnarsie to park and take the L train to Manhattan and transfer to the R to come back to Park Slope!”

Because we care, a couple of possible solutions:

1. Leave your car in a bus stop or a driveway and get towed and then at least your car will be “parked” somewhere
2. Pave Prospect Park and put up a parking lot

*yeah, it should be garage, but gimme a break, that doesn’t scan.