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It’s all Thanksgiving posts this week as we’ll be off next week. I have to start by thanking Karen and Erica for letting me write here over a year ago.  If you’re interested in writing here too, send them an email and they’ll see what you’ve got. The perks include an incredible break room. It’s two floors with a firehouse pole connecting them. But you’ll have to beat me in arm wrestling before you start. 

WANTED: Thanksgiving Models

First post. Uh, another one of those creepy no-pay all-murder modeling gigs. If you decide to go to this bring a friend. And a taser. Maybe have a swat team waiting outside ready to bust in when you say the word. What’s the word? I think I could work “groovy” pretty seamlessly into any conversation.

EVENT: Fucksgiving

Lonely. Did you ever notice how much colder it gets around the holidays? That’s just winter, bro. It’s a season that includes a drastic climate change. Get out of your own head for a second. There is something to feeling more bummed in the winter. It’s called Seasonal Affective Disorder. You might already know that but the fact that its acronym is SAD is the silliest thing ever.

“You hear from Devon lately?”

“Nah, she hasn’t left her apartment since October. She’s got SAD.”

Oh uh. This post is for holiday themed swinger parties.

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Whassup: Pre-Thanks Edition

via car-memes.comIn precisely one week, we will fatten ourselves upon the flesh of what was nearly the national bird. We will wash it down with a glass of whipped cream, and then sing carols around the smoldering fire what was once a sense of finally feeling OK with being single. That's right -- Thanksgiving! Halloween "candy" (by which I, of course, mean excessive alcohol consumption from within a slutty maid costume) was the warmup. Christmas/New Year's will be the denouement. But Thanksgiving it the main event of holiday gorging. What I'm trying to say is, to burn off all that holiday cellulite, you'll need to stay active. So get out there, and shuffle through the cold to attend some of the Slope area's many fine entertainments, which won't stop for snow nor ice nor the birth of our Lord and Savior. A few months of shivering should be enough to keep your body in relatively non-disgusting shape for when spring finally returns. Then all you have to worry about for swimsuit season is your pasty, sun-deprived skin. Welcome to Whassup: Pre-Thanks Edition:

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FIPS Broken News: SantaCon is Coming to Brooklyn

Everyone’s favorite/most hated Christmas NYC event is making its new home in Brooklyn, after 16 years in the East Village. That’s right, SantaCon is coming to Bushwick. For all three of you who don’t know, SantaCon is essentially a bar crawl but with thousands of people dressed in Santa Claus costumes. And, yes, it does devolve into exactly what you would expect.

The news was broken via an email sent to Bushwick bar owners, asking for their participation. “SantaCon 2014 is coming to Bushwick on December 13th from 10am till 2pm. We would like to list your venue as one of our participating locations,” wrote the organizers, in a not-at-all-desperate ask for support. Perhaps this is just another sign that Bushwick is the new East Village, or perhaps it’s a sign that the East Village just kicked them out.

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